now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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