We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
