Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I need to sanitize my soul.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
