i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
