CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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