Your tits are I can't wait for
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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