i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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