Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
