porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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