pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
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