Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sext me about skeletons
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
