i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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