adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
