Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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