Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
