Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
