i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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