i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
