thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
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