he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize
