someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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