i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I bet he comes in French.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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