I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
