god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
