I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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