Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize