All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize