i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
