is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
