If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize