you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
