Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
