You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
