would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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