i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
