my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
