is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize