We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize