I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
