no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
