i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
sex in a hospital.. check
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
