May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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