My brain says no but my pants say off.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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