I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
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