Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
These tits shall not be calmed
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
