Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I want her autograph on my taint
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
