You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
