So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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