id be glad to
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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