I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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