my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
